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Personal Dilemma

 
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sikes
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 2:10 am    Post subject: Personal Dilemma Reply with quote

Salaam

I would like to know if parents have the right to force their children to do something against their will - e.g., marriage.

Thanks in advance!


Last edited by sikes on Mon Feb 02, 2009 12:00 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Dr. Shabbir
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 10:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

>> I would like to know if parents have the right to force their children to do something against their will - e.g., marriage. <<

No parents have the right to force their children to marry against their will.

THE MARRIAGEABLE AGE
The beginning of the physiological cycles in a girl and nocturnal emissions in a boy are commonly believed to be their age of marriage. To the unfortunate Mullah, everything revolves around sex. A Hadith of Bukhari atrociously tells us that a girl can have Nikah (the marital contract) at 6 and the marriage can be consummated at age 9 since the exalted Prophet did that with Hazrat Ayesha! Is there any wonder that the West call him a child-molester? Why don't then the Sunnah-peddlers "marry off" their daughters at 6 and 9? Many countries set an arbitrary 16 years for the girl and 18 years for the boy. The Divine Wisdom enshrined in the Qur’an makes things so sensible. It sets up three rational criteria:
1 - Sufficient maturity to grant consent.
2 - Ability to sign a legal contract.
3 - Competence to take care of one's own finances.
4:6 Train and educate the orphans well and test them. When they reach the age of marriage and attain sound judgment, release their property to them. The marriageable age shall mean attainment of physical and mental maturity when one can legally make a solemn contract (4:21). -----.
4:19 O You who have chosen to be graced with belief! It is not lawful for you to force women into marrying or holding on to them in marriage against their will. ---.
4:21 And how could you take the marital gift back from her after you have lived intimately with each other and after she has taken from you a very Solemn Pledge of the marital contract?

I pray and wish you the best.
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SA
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Dr. Shabbir
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Joined: 24 Dec 2006
Posts: 1328
Location: Florida, USA

PostPosted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 4:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

17:23 (A benevolent society begins at home.) Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and always be kind to your parents. If one of them or both attain old age, do not utter the slightest harsh word to them. Never repel them and always address them respectfully. [36:68]

17:24 Lower for them the wing of kindness and humility and say, "My Lord! Bestow upon them Your grace as they raised me in kindness since I was little."

We must treat our parents nicely. Parents may not force their children in matters such as marriage. Here is another example where we can disobey our parents; when they invite us to SHIRK.

31:13 Luqman, enlightening his son, said this to him, "O My dear son! Never associate anyone with God, for assigning ‘partners’ to Him is a tremendous wrong.”

31:14 “(And O My dear son! God says): We have ordained upon man goodness to his parents. His mother bore him by bearing strain upon strain, and his utter dependence on her lasted no less than two years. So, be grateful to Me and to your parents, and remember that your ultimate destination is with Me.” [2:233, 46:15]

31:15 “Yet, if they strive to make you ascribe partners to Me, then obey them not. However, bear them company in this world with kindness. And follow the path of those who turn toward Me. In the end, all of you will return to Me. And thereupon I will make you understand all that you did.”
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