AsSalaam O Alaikum (Peace be always with you. AMEEN.)
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
By Irshad Mahmood – Director, Siraat-al-Mustaqeem Dawah Centre
Marriage is not just a union of a man and a woman rather it is union of two families. We learn from each other and move forward and try to make our small world Heavenly Likely. Do not expect from a Doctor women to make round roti / chapatti / bread, instead help her to help humanity. Working women deserve to share their workload from their spouse/relatives for housekeeping with true love.
Quraan directs to have simplicity in all aspects of life including Marriage. Always keep in mind that the Top Most Priority Allah put on us is Saving a Life is like Saving the Whole World, (Ref. Al_Quraan_005.032). Make sure to keep your marriage ceremony very simple as directed by the Quraan, NO Racing on Big Functions, NO Showoff (NOT like winning a battle by capturing the bride as a slave). Help the needy by all means if you can.
In Islaam, marriage is a blessed permanent contract between a man and a woman for the whole life, in which each becomes “permitted” to the other, and they begin the long journey of life in a spirit of love, cooperation, harmony and tolerance, where each feels at ease with the other, and finds tranquility, contentment and comfort in the company of the other. The Quraan has described this relationship between men and women, which brings love, mercy, harmony, tranquility, trust, understanding, co-operation, mutual advise, compassion establish a Muslim Family, in the most moving and eloquent terms, (Ref: Al_Quraan_030:021).
Marriage in Economic Downturn in the light of the Quraan for Exceptional Cases:
Now during worse Global Economic Downturn where rich are becoming super rich and poor are becoming super poor and where 1% are extreme riches and 99% are extreme poor, it is becoming hard for an ordinary person to get marry. In this situation women are allowed to work, but still men must have to pay the dowries to their wives at the time of marriage and practically support her for maintaining house work as well. We must come forward to help poor to get marry, (Ref: Al_Quraan_024:032). We must reduce our budget, with NO showoff, NO racing of big parties including on marriages etc. Remember: If people are left without marriage then there are wide chances to increase in illegal sexuality which includes adultery/rape and homosexuality etc.
Purpose of marriage is to obey Allah, protect themselves from illegal sex, and to have loving family for whole life etc., (Ref: Al_Quraan_005:005, 066:006). Remember: Educated men are for educated women, (Ref: Al_Quraan_033:035, 039:009).
Witness Required for Marriage in the Quraan:
Minimum witnesses required for marriage are two witnesses i.e., one from each side in the Quraan, since at the time of breach between two if arises, it is also required to have two councilors, and that is one of the main reason to have consent with parents/guardians at the time of marriage, (Ref: Al_Quraan_004.025, 004.035). The Quraan also demands for announcements for it to avoid consequences/conspiracies, which can be through modern media as well e.g. emails, phones, etc., and make sure that it is a respected announcement, BUT be careful from social media on sharing photos/videos. Marriage can be done in the court as well, especially when any country has some law to protect men and women in marital relationship. Idea of Witnesses can also be taken from the Quraan for ordinary transactions where two men are required for witnesses and if two men are not available then one man and two women (NOT four women) and since BIG huge lifelong changes are happening and lives are involved, Witnesses are necessary (Ref: 002.282, 005.008).
One of the Major Conditions for an Islaamic Marriage is Man giving Dowries to Women:
And give women their DOWRIES as a free gift, but if they of themselves be pleased to give up to you a portion of it, then eat it with enjoyment and with wholesome result, (Al_Quraan_004.004).
It is advised to pay 3 - 4 months of ones income at the time of your wedding for an average earning income man while those who are rich may pay much higher up to one year of income, so that it is not too little that there is no value to afford to live for a person for at least 3 - 4 months without depending on others. For those who are very poor, may pay dowry to wife whatever they can afford upon mutual understanding, (Concepts of 3 - 4 months and one year are taken from Al_Quraan_002:228, 002:234, 002:240, 004.025).
Responsibilities on Rich Person and Governments to help those who cannot afford to marry:
It is responsibilities on every Government as well as on those who are Rich to help those who cannot afford to get marry. They must help the needy to educate/upgrade their skills to find better jobs, since now a days even for doing labor jobs, you might need to get training of tools e.g., folk lifting etc., (Ref: Al_Quraan_024:032-033).
Suggestion for those who cannot afford to marry:
No matter what, be patient, keep remembering Allah and try to do more good acts, as well as more fasting etc., till you can afford to get marry. Try to educate/upgrade yourself to find better jobs, since now a days even for doing labor jobs, you might need to get training of tools e.g., folk lifting etc., (Ref: Al_Quraan_024:032-033).
Please download MarriageCounseling.pdf and distribute to all